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Three Reasons Why Faithfulness is More Important than Success

As a teenager, my pastor introduced me to 1 Cor. 4:2 – Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful. According to Paul, faithfulness isn’t n option for God’s people, it’s a requirement.

On the other hand, while there’s never a command for us to be successful, Jesus does xpect us to produce results. He doesn’t say, Go and TRY to make disciples. He says, Go and MAKE disciples.”

But faithfulness is more important than any results we might experience, for three reasons:

1. Without faithfulness, I wouldn’t be in the game.

I don’t know any pastor who hasn’t thought about quitting at least every few months. One of the things that keeps me in the game is Ps. 37:4 Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness (NASB).

Pastor, when you quit, you eliminate the possibility of success.

2. Without faithfulness, I wouldn’t be qualified for the game.

I know two pastors who have been unfaithful to the point of having a child out of wedlock. One has tried to continue in ministry. The fruit of his ministry has vastly diminished since his marital unfaithfulness. The other one is currently out of ministry and at odds with the church he once pastored.

3. The Master praises the successful servant for his faithfulness.

In the Parable of the Talents (Mt. 25), two out of three of the servants are incredibly successful. They double their master’s holdings. The Master’s response is not, “Well done good and successful servant,” but “well done good and faithful servant.” Apparently, in Jesus’ mind, our success is determined by our faithfulness.

Maybe Jesus applauds faithfulness because faithfulness leads to success?

Many pastors want to quit almost every Monday. Even “successful” ones. Spurgeon fought depression every Monday.

Lots of pastors want to quit post-Easter. After all, the big day is behind us. So, what’s here to look forward to now?

Something like 85% of pastors quit (or at least want to) after completing a building program. Same reason: what’s there to look forward to now?

Pastor, there is so much to look forward to. Long term, there’s the “well done” words of the Master. Short term, most of what you get to do is a privilege beyond description. You get to handle the Word of God, shepherd the people of God, serve the living God, experience the anointing of the Holy Spirit of God.

Don’t give up!

If you remain faithful, God can achieve success through you. God is an expert at taking little and making much out of it. He took the little boy’s five loaves and two fish and fed the masses with it. He took Gideon’s 300 and defeated the hordes with it. He took David’s stone and dropped a nine foot tall giant with it.

Stay in the game. Don’t disqualify yourself through sin or rude behavior. The Master you serve loves your faithfulness and will reward you for it both here and in the life to come! (Mt. 19:29)

Here's the FOREWORD to My Next Book - with thanks to Sergio De La Mora

This coming August, InterVarsity Press will release my newest book, The Bible Questions. I'm praying it introduces thousands who have never read Scripture to the wonders of God's Word, and inspires tens of thousands of believers to develop regular Bible study habits. Today, my friend Sergio De La Mora finished the Foreword to the book. I think I can show it to you without breaking copywrite. So here it is, with deepest thanks to Sergio:

FOREWORD:
On every level of humanity, there is a deep yearning within us. We want to know more than what we can see and understand at face value. And on no other platform do we encounter more questions than in the confines of faith-questions that stem from our profound longing to further grasp what my good friend Hal Seed refers to as "the bigger picture of God and the Bible."

Every one of us seeks answers to the questions that arise from our beliefs. We thirst for understanding, development and maturity . Most people would openly admit that their greatest desire in reading the Bible is not just to know something but to be known by someone. When we admit this, we arrive at a place where answers are found; but more than that, an intimate, fulfilling and lifelong relationship with God is discovered. This process of discovery is the ultimate goal of not just the Bible, but also Hal´s book The Bible Questions .

The Bible Questions is more than simply a reference book or study guide. It´s a deeply thought-provoking and theologically sound manuscript that leads you through a historical journey and helps you discover the tools to answer some of the most poignant and philosophical questions we have asked since the beginning of our existence. The Bible Questions provides the fundamental keys to helping us answer the what, why and how of our own story with God.

Through meticulous detail of historical facts and brilliantly inspired personal insight, Hal invites readers to begin to experience the Bible for themselves and unlock the incredible wisdom and practical knowledge found within. As a pastor and friend, I thank God for Hal´s theological and doctrinal strength and for his commitment to help people think accurately about God.

As you make your way through this book, see it as a journey toward a greater sense of honor and reverence for the authenticity and authority of the Bible. Commit to give your best, and I believe God will give you his best through every revelation in his Word. Begin today to unlock the mysteries of the greatest book in history as you turn the page and answer The Bible Questions.

Come on somebody!

Sergio De La Mora, lead pastor, Cornerstone Church of San Diego, and author, The Heart Revolution

Every Pastor's Top Ten Goals for 2012

Around this time of year, every leader I know is goaded by Isaiah 32:8 - “The noble man makes noble plans and by noble deeds he stands.”

I set my goals for 2012 this week. Some of them are personal, some professional, some physical, some familial. The process got me thinking. Are there some goals every pastor ought to write in stone and just commit to every day?

I think there are.

1. Walk with Jesus.

Easy to write, and tempting to skip. With a pastor’s pace, it’s easy to justify skipping your chair time every morning. But honestly, isn’t walking with Jesus job one?

2. Love your spouse.        

1 Peter 3:7 says, “Husbands, be considerate as you live with your wives… so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” I tell my staff, “If you’re not meeting with Jesus, you won’t have any true power for ministry.” I should add, “And if you’re not loving your husband/wife, you won’t be effective either.”

3. See as many people as possible come to Christ.

There’s always a tension between loving the flock and seeking the lost. In Luke 15, Jesus says that the good shepherd will actually leave his ninety-nine sheep in the open country to go after the lost one.

The problem for pastors is, lost ones don’t make noise. They’re not bleating about better sermons, greater care, or whatever area of ministry is currently under resourced or neglected. Lost ones have only the voice of God whispering in the preacher’s heart, “Come find me.” This is a call we ignore at the peril of others’ eternities.

4. Raise godly children.

The legacy of a great pastor can be a group of wonderful people serving God. The legacy of a great parent is children who grow up to exceed them in ministry. If you have to choose, pick the parent role over the pastor role.

5. Take care of your temple.

Time with Jesus gives you spiritual energy. Exercise and eating right gives you physical energy, as well as longevity of days. For years I admitted that my sweet tooth had control of me. On March 31 this year I decided that if the fruit of the Spirit is self-control, I didn’t need to let my palate be my guide so I gave up sweets altogether. It’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. There is not a single day I wake up wishing I had had some pie or cookies the night before.

6. Increase your skills.

Readers are leaders, so I set a goal of reading at least twenty-four book each year.  Every year I hire a new ministry mentor. Twice a year I attend a conference. Every week I watch a great preacher via videocast. (I used to listen to podcasts. Seeing the preacher’s face, posture, and the arrangement of the room help me.)

7. Expand your world.

I’ve discovered I can see things more clearly at a distance. Therefore, getting out of town several times a year helps my leadership. A few years ago Lori and I visited friends in Quebec, Canada. They have history there! Seeing a different culture always stimulates my vision about what God may want to do in Oceanside. For this reason, I try to take an international trip every year. Every pastor should get far away from their city at least on an annual basis.

8. Avoid sin.

David had it right when he said, “If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened” (Ps. 66:18). God’s blessing to me and progress through me is hindered because of my folly.  I want his best. Sin, by its very definition, is not God’s best for me. The more I say “no” to sin and “yes” to God, the more he is able to use me.

9. Inspire your staff and board.

I am clearly dependent on the people around me. The better they work, the better the work. One of my top priorities is to train, inspire, and encourage my inner circle fervently and strategically. I meet with my staff weekly, Board monthly, and take both of them on semi-annual retreats where I pour into them through Bible study, worship, planning and prayer.

10. Feed your people.

I’m currently reading, Spurgeon: Prince of Preachers. That man changed a whole city by the power of his preaching! Technology and the “cool” factor can seduce us into devoting undue time to the production side of the church service. Leave that to others. The pastor’s greatest moment is the preaching of the Word. When it’s preached with power, lives are changed. Spurgeon believed there was a difference between the written Word and the spoken Word. He said, “I was convicted by the one, but converted by the other.” I’m become increasingly convinced this must be the Senior or Teaching Pastor’s weekly obsession.

That’s my list. What did I miss?  

As part of my ministry to pastors, I've developed a ten-week self-study course called, Momentum Bootcamp. The course is designed to help you grow your church by deepening your heart for the lost and increase your effective at reaching people in your community. You can enroll (free) at www.pastormentor.com. 

Recovering From the Post-Easter Blues

Every pastor I know gets a little depressed (or a lot depressed) on the days following Easter. It’s natural. Easter is our Super Bowl. We pour our lives into preaching, touching and responding to people, surviving the week on less sleep and more adrenaline than we should. Easter comes and attendance peaks. Then it falls again. Hopefully not to its old level, but we were secretly hoping that ALL our guests would return. When they don’t, well, we’re human, and we get disappointed.

How do you resurrect yourself up from the Post-Easter Blues?

There are a number of ways you might try. Here’s one I don’t suggest: Take a Vacation

Some pastors plan a vacation for the week after Easter. Why not? We’ve worked hard, we’ve earned it. – And if we’re out of town, we won’t have to see the inevitable empty seats the following Sunday.

The problem with is, all our volunteers are exhausted too. If they follow our example, no one will be around the following weekend, and whatever inertia was generated by a great Easter experience will lost by the abdication of the leader at the critical moment.

The Critical Moment for Leadership

The most critical time for leadership isn’t on the mountaintop, it’s in the valley. A leader’s finest moments come when the troops are down, not up. Picture Aragorn in The Lord of the Rings when the hordes of Mordor are surrounding his men. He shouts, “Someday the strength of men may fail, but it is not this day!” Or Coach Boone in Remember the Titans, when the boys are being ripped apart by racial tension. He leads them on a pre-dawn run through Gettysburg. Great leaders rise up when momentum is waning. For that reason, the Sunday after Easter may be the most important day of the year for the pastor to preach a great sermon.

A second approach to your post-Easter discouragement is to think rationally about what’s happened. (1) You are tired because you worked hard. This is how life works. And (2) attendance will be down because your once-a-year attenders all showed up for Easter. They won’t be back next weekend. Nor will your once-a-month, twice-a-month, or twice-a-year attenders. They haven’t left you; they’re just following their normal patterns.

Don’t allow others’ lukewarm attitudes to quench your fire for God. Instead, leverage the pain you feel to motivate a solution. Thinking rationally, what would it take to inspire those people to return the following Sunday?

Here are a few suggestions:

1. Get excited.

You’ve heard the adage, “The speed of the leader, the speed of the team.” If you are not excited about next weekend, nobody else will be either. But if you are over-the-top energized about what’s coming, your excitement will infect others. So, what type of sermon series would really excite you? Better, what type of series would excite you and the people you’re trying to get to return?

2. Launch a Great, Relevant Series

Almost everyone wants help with their family or marriage. Those two subjects are a universal draw. Another relevant topic is purpose. Rick Warren sold more books with this subject than any piece of literature short of the Bible. A matter that’s on everyone’s mind these days is The End Times. With turbulence in the Middle East and earthquakes in the Pacific Rim, everyone wants to know if we’re approaching the end of the world.

As you advertise the series, generate a sense of urgency by impressing on everyone how relevant/important/life-changing the next Sunday’s message will be. If this feels like manipulation to you, find a different topic or rewrite your opening message. The Bible contains the most relevant/important/life-changing material in all of history. Use it that way.

3. Offer an Incentive to Return

This year we decided to get creative about motivating our newcomers to return. Some might question this concept, but God motives us to get out of bed every day with the offer of sunlight and food and meaningful labor. Esther motivated Xerxes to return the following evening by offering a banquet.  Most of what we do in life is because of some sort of incentive.

For years New Song has offered a free lunch to newcomers on the Sunday following Easter. This year we’re letting them know that if they fill out their Connection Card, we’ll mail them a ticket which could win them an iPad if they’re present at the lunch. Will it bring them back? We’ll find out soon.

4. Create a Follow-Up Event

Two weeks after Easter we’re offering additional incentives to return. We’re holding a special Family Experience for parents and kids. We’re starting Dave Ramsay’s Financial Peace University. We’re launching a Date-Night Marriage Experience. And, we’ll be using my book Future History (http://www.pastormentor.com/html/future_history__book.html) for a study of the end times. You may already have similar events coming up that just need a little advertising. If not, I’m guessing you can generate one or two fairly quickly.

Solutions like these will diminish the post-Easter attendance slump, but let’s face it: no matter what the attendance, you’re still going to be tired. How do you fight the desire to curl up in a ball from sheer exhaustion?

To a certain extent, you don’t. The Sabbath was made for man, and unless you put your pants on differently than the rest of us, you will need to rest. I plan to get a little extra sleep after Easter, but from experience I know that sleep alone does not refresh my soul. So years ago I looked at the life of Elijah to find out how to cure physical and spiritual exhaustion. What I found has helped me ever since.

Three Ways to Speed Recovery from Easter

After climbing Mt. Carmel, Elijah prayed down fire from heaven, executed hundreds of false prophets, prayed again until rain fell, then outran a chariot before taking a forty-day walk. Even with the eleven services we’ll be doing this year, my spiritual and physical workload doesn’t come close to matching Elijah’s. If he could recover from his massive exertion, I can too.

What did Elijah do to recover? Well, first, he slept. That’s on my checklist. Then, three things happened to him that enabled him to continue in ministry.

Elijah had a thing about mountains. After expending energy on Mt. Carmel, he recovered energy on Mt. Horeb.

1. Expose Yourself to God’s Power

While Elijah is standing on the mountain, God sends a wind, an earthquake, and a firestorm to rouse him. The Prophet may have been drowsy, but those forces roused him quickly!

In what ways to you experience God’s power?

I get energized by listening to Christian leaders teach on vision and leadership. I’ve never done drugs, but for me, listening to Bill Hybels speak on leadership feels a lot like what I imagine to be a drug-induced high. Bill’s opening talks at the Leadership Summit remind me of why I’m on this planet and why I signed up to plant a church. So every year I buy the Summit DVDs.  Andy Stanley and Craig Groeschel have a similar effect on me, so I buy the Catalyst DVDs too.

On Monday and Tuesday after Easter, I’ll watch a few of those messages. And my sense of purpose, hope and energy will elevate.

2. Expose Yourself to God’s Whisper

After his wind, earthquake and fire, Elijah experienced the still small voice of God. The Lord whispered to him, “What are you doing here Elijah?” which initiated an intimate conversation.

I have a chair I love to reflect in. After watching a leadership message, I’ll meet with God in that chair, where more often than not, the Lord brings me to a place of green pastures and restores my soul.

3. Expose Yourself to God’s New Directions

After the whisper, God gave Elijah a new assignment. For three years the Prophet had been focusing on one event: the defeat of Baal worship. Part of his depression came from having no more big event to look forward to.

Pastor, you’re a leader, and leaders need directives and directions on ministries to launch, people to pour into and new hills-to-take. Once the Easter challenge is behind you, listen to God for His next assignment – and don’t settle for something like taking up tennis, or joining a bird-watching society. Listen for how He wants you to build His Kingdom, and then gear up and got after it as He leads. For me, that means sitting in my chair with a journal in my hand, saying, “Speak Lord, your servant is listening.”

These three steps (exposure to God’s power, God’s whisper, and God’s new direction) may look different for you than they do for me. But they restored Elijah to ministry and I believe they will help speed your recover too. We are in this contest for life, so let’s run with endurance the race marked out for us!

Reflections of Seventeen Years

The following was sent to New Song Church members today. I post it here in hopes that some who have moved away and some who have looked on from the outside might be encouraged by my reflections today:

New Song turns 17 tomorrow. Many of you will not have time to read these reflections. I understand. But some of you might appreciate the ramblings of a pastor who has been as blessed as anyone on the planet.

 

Lori and I moved to Oceanside on July 15, 1991. Our blue Honda Accord was loaded down with two cats and two kids. Bryan was four; Amy, almost three. We had no idea what lay ahead of us.

 

As we passed the “Welcome to Oceanside” sign, we knew no one in the city. We had no friends, no family, no church and no money. Only a dream. And a hope that God would bless that which he had called us to do: start a church to reach lost people in North County, San Diego.

 

We’ve tried to be faithful, and God has been so much more. The 6,700 decisions for Christ, six daughter churches planted, six parachurches founded, the innumerable people repaired and restored, the marriages and lives elevated don’t begin to tell the story of how rich this experience has been. Because God has been faithful. To him be the glory. His promises are true! I know from personal experience that the Lord is with those who are with him; that the mind of a man can plan his ways, but it will be the Lord who directs his steps. I am a most blessed man.

 

Seventeen years have taught me the value of friendship and faithfulness over time. These are treasures reserved for those who are committed, for those who weather storms with each other; who persevere in hardship, and reconcile and forgive when offense is taken. These are treasures that come from the deep, like silver or gold, mined from shafts that go far down into the depths of the earth.

 

I have learned that right choices make all the difference. I have watched spouses make wrong choices that exact a toll from everyone they love. I have watched other spouses choose to do the right thing in the face of pain and become better people, bigger-hearted and bigger-faithed; and more blessed by God because they did what was right rather than what felt right in an impulsive moment or season of life.

 

I have learned about faith. I have trusted God when resources didn’t seem to be there, and then seen his generosity poured through an individual or group, providing exactly what was needed. I have trusted him for miracles, some of which he has granted, others he has withheld in order to build my character.

 

I have learned about love. The Beatles weren’t quite right. Love isn’t all you need; but it’s pretty close. That, and the forgiveness of Christ, plus an occasional trip to the grocery store can sustain a life, change a life, and give hope to the hopeless like no other. The love I have received from my wife, my children, this church, and this community have filled my soul. Only Jesus’ love surpasses it.

 

I have learned that generosity starts at home. If you can teach your children that it is more blessed to give than to receive, you have created an unstoppable force.

 

I have learned the value of right priorities. On the picture wall of my mind are portraits of families who have made sacrifices for God and his purposes and choices to do what he asks. These stand out in bold relief, with, “BLESSED BEYOND BELIEF” emblazoned behind them. While others, choosing lesser things, have muddied photos, with “REGRET” stamped in dingy gray behind their heads.

 

The better part of my life has been invested in New Song Community Church and in reaching the people of North County.

 

The best parts of this investment are a trifecta of divine blessings I never anticipated. The first of these are the memories. In my head are sacred scenes that I will not forget in this life or the next. These scenes are rich with the smiling faces of changed lives.

 

Beside the memories are the dreams of our future. At 17, if she were a citizen, New Song still wouldn’t be old enough to vote. She continues to grow towards her full potential. I dream of filling our building with freshly redeemed loved ones and friends, and then spilling out into locations and cities around us. I dream of expanded ministry to the military, and to Spanish-speakers, and seniors. I dream of touching an increased number of lives in our community as The Church Next Door. One changed life at a time has always been God’s way. Life by life by life, I dream of the day when not just our present building, but multiple buildings are filled with redeemed souls, joyfully and diligently growing in Christ and serving our community together.

 

Next to the memories and dreams in my mind is the hope of heaven. I can see the sea of faces as we gather before our Lord and King one day and give him corporate praise. By then, New Song will be a vast army of Christ-lovers, of various sizes and hues, and maybe varied languages as well. On that day we will be one with the Father and one with each other through the work of Christ whom we will worship in the greatest party ever thrown.

 

I would not trade these seventeen for any others. I hope for seventeen, or twenty-seven, or thirty-seven more with you all.

 

Happy Anniversary New Song,

 

Hal

How to Avoid Getting Stuck at Good Enough

Great people don’t start out great. They get there by taking one step at a time.

 

Sure, some people are born with nicer voices, better looks, or smarter parents. But as people made in the image of God, we all have the seeds of greatness within us. Great people become great by improving their character, talents, thinking or godliness one step at a time. They read a book, take a class, begin a new habit, or sit in front of a piano and practice, one session at a time.

 

In my ministry with pastors I’ve begun to hear a refrain that concerns me. Several have said recently, “I don’t have time to grow.” These men are so busy working in their ministry that they don’t have time for self-improvement, or even church-improvement; which means that a year from now they’ll be at the same level of spiritual maturity and their church will be doing the same level of ministry it is today.

 

Business author Jim Collins says, “Good is the enemy of great.” By that he means that once we reach a certain level, that level fights against us improving further. We’re so busy doing good things for God that we forget to dream about doing great things for Him, or being great followers of His. No one means to stop at good; we just get stuck there by accident.

 

To advance towards greatness, take one small step today, and then another next week or month, and another after that, and another after that, and so on.

 

For instance, what often separates good leaders from great ones is that good leaders set goals, while great leaders write them out. One step from good towards great might be to begin writing out two or three monthly goals and working towards them.

 

Another option could be to enlist a mentor. The quality of our leadership is significantly influenced by the quality of leaders we spend time with. Enlisting a mentor who offers advice, resources and regular assignments is an accelerated plan towards greatness.

 

This one-step-at-a-time approach is also how churches go from good to great. If we can quantify it this way, improving the systems and processes in your church by 1% per month will result in a 12% improvement in a year. Increase that step rate to 1% a week and you accelerate to a 52% improvement in a year.

 

There is an endless list of possibilities for good next steps in your life. Why not take one today?

How To Write A Great Story

I want to tell you how to write a great story, and then I want to tell you how to write the greatest possible story. So if this subject interests you, be sure and read all the way to the bottom.

 

Some have called the story of Jesus, “The Greatest Story Ever Told.” I’d cast my vote that way. What makes the story of Jesus so great?

 

1. The hero in the story (Jesus) is a true hero. - He’s impressive, yet humble; likeable, yet awe-inspiring.

 

2. Jesus’ story is about achieving a worthy goal. – He came to make it possible for people to have a relationship with God and to do so, he was going to have to give his own life on our behalf. That’s a goal that takes people’s breath away. With every page, we want to know, “Can he do it?”  “How will he do it?” And, “How will people respond if he does it?”

 

3. Along the way, he overcame great obstacles to achieve his goal.

 

In my humble opinion, the second greatest story ever told is J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings. What makes that story great? It has a great hero (Frodo is impressive, yet humble). The hero has a great goal (he must destroy a great evil in order to save the people he loves). In the process, he overcomes great obstacles.

 

You and I could list a myriad of stories that follow that same pattern: Joseph, Daniel and Paul from the Bible; the heroes of Clancy, Grisham and company from today. They all have the same three elements: a likable hero, an impressive goal, and overcoming great obstacles.

 

Those three elements are essential to any great story. Nobody wants to read about a snob whose goal is to create a comfortable life for himself, and who achieves his goal without exerting much effort. Page-turners are made of great heroes with great goals who overcome great obstacles along the way. That’s the formula.

 

Now that you know how to write a great story, here’s my encouragement to you. Write that story with your life. God has placed you on this planet to write a great story with the only life you’ve been given. Long before you were born, he wrote what you might call “The Prologue” to your story. He published the idea that he’d like your story to be about a relationship with him (John 3:16) in which you help others enter into relationship with him as well (Matthew 28:19-20).

 

So if you’ve read carefully, you know that that’s your great goal. (If you haven’t, I encourage you to read the stories in the Bible of John 3 and Matthew 28. They’re not hard to find.)

 

Before your birth, God wrote the opening paragraph of your story. He gave you a place to be born, a body to live in, and a family to name and nurture you. As you grew, you encountered obstacles. Some of them came from your family, some from friends, and some from circumstances. How have you done so far? Have you preserved, learned, and grown from these challenges? How have you done with achieving your God-given goal? (The Matthew 28:19-20 one.) There are still a lot of pages yet to be written in your story. What will you write on them?

 

To write the greatest story of all, you will need to become the hero of your story - impressive in how you handle obstacles, yet likeable by those who read what you write. You’ll need to play your part in God’s great story of bringing people to himself. And you’ll need to stand in the face of obstacles and overcome challenges that a great life inevitably encounters.

 

Make your choices carefully. You are writing the most important story of eternity, the story that will determine what people read about you forever.

 

And know this. You are not alone in your story. I am here rooting for you. And God is up in heaven not just cheering you on, but crouching forward, eager to assist you at every turn. “The eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” - 2 Chronicles 16:9

Respond to Criticism with Seven Great Questions

Yesterday I suggested that preachers request their congregants give them 48 hours to recuperate before giving criticism. Once you receive criticism, how should you respond to it? Let me suggestion seven questions you ought to ask before doing (or saying) anything:

1. What part of this is true? (And what should I do about it?)

2. Hurt people hurt people, so how is my critic hurting, and how can I help him/her?

3. How important is this issue to the health of the church?

4. How easy would it be to make the changes being suggested?

5. What would improve if I implemented this suggestion?

6. What might be hurt if I implemented this suggestion?

7. What does my wife think about this criticism? Does she see some truth in it that I am missing?

When it comes to criticism, you want to weigh what is said and by whom, rather than counting the number of people saying it. Critics often build their case by saying, “Alot of people are thinking this way.” They want to present as forceful an argument as possible, when in reality, it may be that just they and their best friend had one conversation about it. You can ask for specific names if you want, and then count how many people actually feel this way, or, a better way is to weigh the wisdom and influence behind the criticism. For instance, if key a Board member, staff member or Elder is offering this criticism, their one voice might count for a lot more than ten or twenty uninformed or uninvolved fringe attendees. Weigh the criticism as you ask your seven questions. Pray. Resist obsessing. And use what is said to build your character and the church.

Oh, and if what was offered was done in a kind manner, with good intentions, be sure to thank your critic and ask God to bring you more of this kind of feedback.

What methods have you found helpful in handling criticism?

Recieving Criticism

What leaders do matters to the people who follow them. When a pastor preaches a poor sermon, makes a bad decision, or does something embarrassing, his or her people are affected by it. Often these people will express their feelings to your face, which is good. Some of my best advice has come from those who have been frustrated with me.

Preachers, like authors, poets, and songwriters, pour their souls into their sermons. So, when a parishioner criticizes it, they are criticizing us, and that hurts. Asking people not to criticize isn’t good for them and it isn’t good for us. If we turn off this feedback mechanism, we miss out on great advice, a chance to minister to a hurting person, and the teaching moments that take place when we are able to help overly-critical people develop more mature coping skills.

Fortunately, it’s been a long time since someone wanted to criticize one of my sermons, but early on I developed a principle that has served me well: You can criticize all you want, just wait until Tuesday.

This 48 hour rule has helped me a lot. I hope it will help you in your ministry as well.

Giving Grace on Mondays

The spiritual realm, with all the enemies it holds, is a very real one for pastors, missionaries and Christian leaders. What we do is exactly what Satan, Inc. would like to extinguish.

Personally, I believe that demons like to poke and prod Christian leaders when we are at our weakest. One of their favorite relationships to poke is the pastor’s marriage. One of their favorite times to do so is Sunday afternoon and Monday, when pastor and spouse are often exhausted and vulnerable from intense people-filled ministry.

Lori and I decided many years ago that we would give extra grace on Sundays and Mondays. We try our best to refrain from petty comments, and to overlook them should they come our way during that time. Ideally, we’d be perfect all week long, but when we’re not, we apply grace, and when we’re exhausted, we apply extra grace. We also try to postpone criticisms and important decision-making conversations until Tuesday.  Life just works better for us this way. I think it might be a good rule of thumb for most pastors.